note to self: when you can't do or say anything right, implicating yourself
in a scandal in order to "clear the air" may not be the best idea. Yeah,
keep that in mind for next time.

"next time" is the most passive aggressive phrase in the english language.
a long, labored "uuuuuuuhhhhhhhmmmmm", followed by a false-nice high pitched
"NEXT time . . . . ." followed by "could you do this instead of that because
we've all been talking about how much that in particular pisses us off."

And you know what else?
Don't ever take a bite of something and then dial a phone. The telephone
should come with those specific instructions.
I don't believe there is a single circumstance in which you have to eat and
make a phone call at the exact same time. If you can't wait five minutes to
make that phone call, you can wait five minutes to eat that phat sangwich.
If you gotta eat, do so, and call me later. Bitch, I will hang up on
you. I've done it before.